In 1975 I married a handsome young man. I worked for two years in a retail office while he went to school for law enforcement. We moved back to our home town, and our son (Kass) was born. Soon after, my husband got his first job in law enforcement moving eventually to a deputy for the county. Then our first daughter (Cody) was born and two years after that our second daughter (Cole) was born. We lived there for many years, but my husband’s sights were set higher, and he eventually was hired as a police officer in the twin cities.

A big purple elephant started rearing its ugly head in our home, and after much persuasion I began attending “Alanon.” It wasn’t long after that my husband moved out of our home. Alanon became my life line and I attended three times a week. I had literally lost myself mentally and physically; I started having seizures with all the stress.

We were separated for four years; I didn’t want a divorce but I couldn’t live as we were either. And as for my kids, well, I don’t know as my thoughts were so consumed with their father and his actions.

We divorced.

I had always attended a church but during these four years of separation a friend introduced me to a wonderful church in South Minneapolis called “Park Avenue Methodist Church.” What a blessing this was to me. I met some of my closest friends to this day (Wendy and Diane). Right about the same time I also was hired at the University of Minnesota. It’s amazing what God will do for you when you just turn it all over to Him.

As one year led into another, I started dabbling in dating……..whew……… I was making some pretty bad choices and I finally went to God with this request, “God please bring someone to me, who loves you, like I do.” I must have prayed that 30+ times.

I put an ad in the newspaper regarding dating (at that time the internet dating was not the thing yet). In the ad I asked for a Christian, a college graduate, a nonsmoker, a nondrinker, humorous, good looking and the list went on and on, I even asked for a picture……can’t believe I was so bold. I’m surprised anyone answered but I got some replies. I called this one individual who had sent me a picture of himself alongside his 90 year old grandmother.

Well that was 15 years ago and I have been married to Tim 14 of those years. I didn’t know it at the time, but he was the answer to the prayer I had prayed 30+ times. The relationship that we have today is something a person can only dream about and to say that I am blessed is just not enough. We have centered our life around Christ, and yes we do have trials and bad days just like the rest of the world, but we know where to go with them when we do; to the foot of the cross and into prayer.

I was lost in great pain and despair and I was brought to a new height that I didn’t know existed; you can have the same, and it is for that reason I have opened up my story for you today.

Bette